Brendan: Where do sharks go on summer vacation?
Jordan: Where?
Brendan: Finland!

Submitted by Brendan G., Kirkland, Wash.

A book never written: “Where to Stay on Vacation” by Moe Tell.

Submitted by Miles K., Denton, Tex.

Erik: Why did the robot go on summer vacation?
Sarah: I haven’t a clue.
Erik: He needed to recharge his batteries.

Submitted by Erik E., Seahurst, Wash.

Mike: Why don’t mummies go on summer vacation?
Hank: I don’t know.
Mike: They’re afraid to relax and unwind!

Submitted by Keith K., Portsmouth, Va.

Elaine: Where do eggs go on summer vacation?
Peter: I don’t know.
Elaine: New Yolk City!

Submitted by Luke D., Oglesby, Ill.

First woman: My son came to visit for summer vacation.
Second woman: How nice! Did you meet him at the airport?
First woman: Oh, no. I’ve known him for years!

Submitted by Menachem Z. S., Brooklyn, N.Y.

A book never written: “Vacations Are So Expensive” by Seymour Foreles.

Submitted by Sean K., Arlington Heights, Ill.

Jacob: Why can’t basketball players go on summer vacation?
Riley: Why not?
Jacob: They’d get called for traveling!

Submitted by Jacob M., Omaha, Neb.

Jake: What did the bread do on vacation?
Drake: What?
Jake: It loafed around.

Submitted by Robert G., Pacific Palisades, Calif.

Billy: Where did Tarzan go on summer vacation?
Ian: Where?
Billy: Hollywood and Vine.

Submitted by Thomas S. C., New York, N.Y.

Teacher: Johnny, please use the words “letter carrier” in a sentence.
Johnny: Yes, ma’am. “My dad said that after seeing how many things my mom was bringing on vacation, he would rather letter carrier own luggage.”

Submitted by Brian G., Poestenkill, N.Y.

First dog: Where do fleas go for summer vacation?
Second dog: Search me!

Submitted by William J., Havelock, N.C.

Spencer: What summer vacation destination makes your pet bird sing for joy?
Brian: I haven’t a clue.
Spencer: The Canary Islands!

Submitted by Spencer D., Prescott, Ariz.

Stephan: Where did the sheep go on vacation?
Michael: Where?
Stephan: The Baa-hamas!

Submitted by Stephan W., Lake in the Hills, Ill.

Bob: What’s gray, has four legs and a trunk?
Jim: An elephant.
Bob: No, a mouse on vacation.

Submitted by Daniel C., Nashville, Tenn.

Monica: Where did your mom go for her summer vacation?
Josh: Alaska.
Monica: Never mind, I’ll ask her myself.

Submitted by Henry C., Forest Hills, N.Y.

Charles: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?
Ray: Why?
Charles: To make up for his miserable summer.

Submitted by Charles S. Jr., Fort Washington, Md.

John: What’s brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?
Ron: What?
John: A coconut on vacation!

Submitted by Jonathan W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Myles: Why didn’t the elephant buy a suitcase for his vacation?
Henry: Why?
Myles: Because he already had a trunk!

Submitted by Myles F., North Smithfield, R.I.